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You are here: Home / Check it Out / What to Do When Relationships Blow Up

What to Do When Relationships Blow Up

May 27, 2015 By Peter Krol

Yesterday, The Gospel Coalition published my article about “7 Steps to Conflict Resolution.” In the article, I walk through Philippians 4:2-9 to show that – far from being a random assortment of unrelated memory verses – this section provides concrete steps for navigating excruciating conflict.

Two prominent women—Euodia and Syntyche—had a disagreement so severe and public the entire church knew about it, and word reached the Apostle Paul (Phil 4:2). These women had once been ministry partners, but now they sat on opposite sides of the table. They couldn’t resolve their concerns on their own, so Paul employed a third party—his “true companion”—to lend aid (Phil 4:3).

Far from changing the subject, Paul coached his true companion over the next few verses on the process of mediation and reconciliation, providing steps to resolution.

Paul’s 7 steps are:

  1. Rejoice in the Lord always
  2. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone
  3. Remember the Lord is at hand
  4. Don’t be anxious about the conflict, but ask God to resolve it
  5. Guard your heart and mind with the peace of God, even when it does not make sense to do so
  6. Find something – anything – praiseworthy to focus on in your antagonists
  7. Find good role models and continue practicing these things

Doug Smith also recently preached a sermon on this text examining these principles further.

If you’d like to see my full article, check it out!

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