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Detailing the Consequences of Immorality

March 27, 2026 By Peter Krol

This week we continue our study of the illusion of sexual freedom.

And now, O sons, listen to me,
And do not depart from the words of my mouth.
Keep your way far from her,
And do not go near the door of her house,
Lest you give your honor to others
And your years to the merciless,
Lest strangers take their fill of your strength,
And your labors go to the house of a foreigner,
And at the end of your life you groan,
When your flesh and body are consumed,
And you say, “How I hated discipline,
And my heart despised reproof!
I did not listen to the voice of my teachers
Or incline my ear to my instructors.
I am at the brink of utter ruin
In the assembled congregation” (Prov 5:7-14).

Notice that the command to listen is repeated once again (Prov 5:7). Don’t let its familiarity cause you to hurry past it. Let it remind you of your need for help from outside yourself. Ask any recovering addict: You will not win this battle on your own.

Rochelle Hartman (2011), Creative Commons

Avoid immorality at all costs (Prov 5:8). Otherwise it will cause you to:

Lose your best years (Prov 5:9). The springtime of life could be spent on serving the Lord and growing his kingdom. Don’t give that up.
Squander your strength and the fruit of your labor (Prov 5:10). You’ll spend all your energy coping with your sin. Wouldn’t you rather have something else to look back on as your life’s work?
Regret all the waste and its wreckage (Prov 5:11). The night before I graduated from college, a hall mate asked if I had any regrets. I looked back over those four years, and with full honesty said, “No.” I hadn’t done everything perfectly, but the Lord had given me rest in him and in his work in my life. That night, I committed to living the rest of my life with the end in mind. I don’t regret that choice one bit.
Stagger from all of the guilt (Prov 5:12). You’ll finally identify the foolishness in your heart and the damaging behavior it led to. The weight of it will sink in.
Cower beneath all the shame (Prov 5:13). You’ll realize the problem wasn’t that you didn’t have enough information, but that you didn’t have enough conviction.
Despair at the public disgrace (Prov 5:14). You could be “that guy who ran off with the girl” back at your home church. I regret many indiscretions of my teen years. One particular incident came to light just before my high school graduation and crushed the respect a younger sister in Christ had for me. Her parting words – “How could you?!” – remain etched in my memory.

I want to make two things very clear. First, we must not minimize the consequences of our sin. Consider: Is it worth it? Decide now, not when temptation happens. We also must not buffer others from the consequences of their sin. God saves sinners – I am foremost! – by breaking all their hope to pieces, leaving none but Jesus (Mat 21:42-44, Rom 7:7-12). Don’t hinder any work of God by boxing out the truth.

Second, if this passage has discouraged you, please remember Proverbs 4: There is always hope that we can grow. Solomon depicts the end of immorality on purpose. He does it so we might change course before the end arrives. If you’re reading Solomon, it’s not too late for you. Just do nothing, and you’ll ruin all. Fear the Lord, and anything can change.

Share your struggles with pastors or wise leaders. Ask them to help you figure out what you desire (since what we do is always a result of what we desire). Many people turn to sexual immorality out of a desire for control (when life feels out of control), escape (when things are difficult), or acceptance (when they feel rejected by those they care about most). Identify what God desires for you instead (that you know him and find long life, peace, pleasantness, etc.), and ask him to help you change. Then turn from your sinful desires and grasp new, godly desires. Once wisdom changes who you are, it will flow into everything you do.

This post was first published in 2013 and is part of a series walking through Proverbs 1-9.

The Death of Immorality

March 20, 2026 By Peter Krol

Sexual freedom is an illusion, because immorality is not as pretty as it seems.

But in the end she is bitter as wormwood,
Sharp as a two-edged sword.
Her feet go down to death;
Her steps follow the path to Sheol;
She does not ponder the path of life;
Her ways wander, and she does not know it (Prov 5:4-6).

Last week, we saw that the “adulteress” is an image of all sexual immorality. Immorality has a sweet candy coating, but inside it’s a bitter pill (Prov 5:4). “Wormwood” is a plant with a bitter taste, and that’s what immorality is once you move past first impressions. I know a guy who works for a chemical company that works on both drugs and candy. He told me that the outer shell on an M&M is the same thing as the shell on an Advil. Next time you have the chance, I dare you to bite into the Advil.

Immorality leads only to death (Prov 5:5). The last thing it has in mind is our good (Prov 5:6a). In fact, it’s not even aware of the harm it causes (Prov 5:6b). Immorality is full of passion, but it’s clueless and self-defeating, like a pimply freshman inviting the homecoming queen over for video gaming.

How does this apply? Sexual immorality promises life, but the wise know it really gives death. We ought to be ready, especially for the battle of words. We have to expose immorality’s sweet-talk. We must remind ourselves of the truth. We need to discuss it often with others, to warn them. We unhinge its power when we strip it of its secrecy.

Consider just one major issue in our day: online pornography. Note how broad are the battle lines and how widespread is the death:

The porn industry makes around $97 billion per year.
87% of men report watching porn at least weekly.
It’s not a “guy issue,” though. It mostly just goes unreported among women.
Half of all teenagers have seen online porn by age 15.
Though only 4% of all website are pornographic, those sites draw 13% of all web searches and 20% of all mobile searches.
About 40 million Americans visit porn sites regularly.
About 68% of the general population report using porn. Among Christians, about 54% report porn use.
All this despite the accessibility of published research demonstrating the correlation of porn use with poor mental health, declining sexual fulfillment, increased divorce, and domestic violence.

Death surrounds us, and it’s covered in pretty makeup and stage lighting. We must discuss it frankly yet graciously, for no one who indulges in it will go unharmed.

This post was first published in 2013 and is part of a series walking through Proverbs 1-9.

Appearances are Deceiving, Especially When Hormones are Involved

March 13, 2026 By Peter Krol

The cultural ideal of “sexual freedom” is an illusion. Don’t be fooled.

My son, be attentive to my wisdom;
Incline your ear to my understanding,
That you may keep discretion,
And your lips may guard knowledge.
For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey,
And her speech is smoother than oil (Prov 5:1-3)

Solomon begins Proverbs 5 with another reminder to listen to his wisdom (Prov 5:1). If we don’t passively receive and actively seek instruction in the sexual realm, we endanger our lives. Once we receive it through our ears, we ought to “keep discretion” (presumably in our hearts, as Prov 4:21 advises). Then it changes who we are, affecting what we do, especially with our “lips” (Prov 5:2). Our lips must guard knowledge because honey drips from the forbidden woman’s lips. Her speech is smooth enough to make oil seem irritating, so we ought to be ready (Prov 5:3).

Before continuing, let’s clarify who the “forbidden woman” is. Remember that Proverbs is a work of poetic wisdom literature. As poetry, it makes liberal use of imagery to evoke an emotional reaction, but, as wisdom literature, it assumes we’ll think hard about what we’re reading. Earlier in Proverbs, Solomon exaggerated the portraits of his characters: the bumbling gang of thieves (Prov 1:10-19), Lady Wisdom the mocking street preacher (Prov 1:20-33), the adulteress whose house sinks through the ground into the grave (Prov 2:16-19), and the sleep-deprived, ferocious evildoers (Prov 4:14-17).

Solomon paints such an exaggerated picture of his subject to strengthen his point. He takes a character type and vividly describes the worst-case scenario for that type, thus including all variations of explicitness and severity. For example, in describing the violent gang, Solomon critiques all who want to get more stuff at the expense of others (Prov 1:19). Through Wisdom’s speech, Solomon warns not only those who have already harmed themselves but also everyone who loves being simple (Prov 1:22). When he warns against joining ravenous evildoers, he warns us to avoid their highway, not just their particular rest stop. We shouldn’t risk even entering it (Prov 4:14).

Who then is the “forbidden woman” in Proverbs 5? She includes loose women who tire of their husbands, but she ultimately represents every enticement to sexual immorality that you and I, whether male or female, experience. Solomon is clear about this fact when he broadens his final applications to include not just adulterers, and not just sexually immoral people, but all “the wicked” who show “great folly” (Prov 5:22-23). Whatever your gender, age, or marital status, this chapter of Proverbs applies to you. In fact, this chapter can help if your temptation involves the opposite sex, the same sex, solo sex, or images on a computer monitor. The “forbidden woman” still drips her honey at you, and you had better watch out. Therefore, for the sake of clarity, I’ll use the word “immorality” in future posts to refer to the opponent Solomon has in mind.

This post was first published in 2013 and is part of a series walking through Proverbs 1-9.

The Illusion of Sexual Freedom

March 6, 2026 By Peter Krol

Sex is a polarizing concept. It began beautifully when husband and wife were naked and unashamed (Gen 2:25), but it went downhill when they decided to love themselves more than God or each other (Gen 3:5, 7, 12, 22). Ever since, we’ve been terribly confused.

We need much wisdom to navigate between the proud lewdness of our culture and the traditional prudishness of Christians. Both sides represent a foolish oversimplification of what God intends sexuality to be, and the simple can get caught in the middle. And confusion multiplies when culture is prudish and Christians are lewd. Or when prudish Christians speak about sex as lewdly as the culture does. Or lewd Christians feign prudishness to fit in. How can the simple find their way?

In chapter 5 of Proverbs—which we’ll examine over the next few weeks—Solomon provides wisdom in the sexual realm. He suggests that not all is as it seems (Prov 5:1-6) and that the wrong choices have dire consequences (Prov 5:7-14). Utter unselfishness in the context of marital love is surprisingly intoxicating (Prov 5:15-20), and those who think they know satisfaction better than God does have sprung their own trap (Prov 5:21-23).

This post was first published in 2013 and is part of a series walking through Proverbs 1-9.

The End of Wisdom

October 6, 2014 By Peter Krol

Teti-Tots (2010), Creative Commons

This is my last post about Proverbs 1-9, and I end where Solomon ends—with a warning. Though folly looks a lot like wisdom, don’t let it deceive you. It will flatter you, trick you, and end you.

The woman Folly is loud;
she is seductive and knows nothing.
She sits at the door of her house;
she takes a seat on the highest places of the town,
calling to those who pass by,
who are going straight on their way.
“Whoever is simple, let him turn in here!”
And to him who lacks sense she says,
“Stolen water is sweet,
and bread eaten in secret in pleasant.”
But he does not know that the dead are there,
that her guests are in the depths of Sheol. (Prov 9:13-18, ESV)

I’ve listed extensive comparisons and contrasts between the feasts of wisdom and folly. In this post, I simply want to warn you of 4 things that look like wisdom but are not. They have ensnared many in our day.

Materialism

Some find their life and security in their abundance of possessions. Others react and find their life and security in their lack of possessions. Both are fools, though they often think themselves wise. Money is neither a god to be worshiped nor a demon to be exorcised. It is a tool useful for building God’s kingdom. It makes friends; it persuades kings. But God can give it or take it away as he pleases, and the wise will bow to him alone.

Sensuality

Some think sex will make them happy. Others react and treat it as something unfit to be discussed in Bible study. Both are fools, though they often think themselves wise. Sex is neither the chief end of man nor the fruit of the fall. The wise won’t ignore the temptation common to man, to abuse this gift. And the wise won’t wield the subject like a taser, merely for its shock value. But…what can I say? The wise husband loves his wife’s breasts (Prov 5:19). And the wise wife will find things about her husband that are equally intoxicating (Song 1:2).

Autonomy

“If you are wise, you are wise for yourself” (Prov 9:12). But that doesn’t mean you can be wise by yourself. Nor that you get to decide what is wise (Gen 3:6). Wisdom begins with the fear of the Lord, and it ends when instruction goes despised and unheeded. Those who have their act together may have an appearance of wisdom, but they deny wisdom’s true power to change and guide anyone (Prov 1:5).

Authoritarianism

Some fools believe their role or authority gives them value and power over people. Those who support such folly are fools themselves. A sanitized version of this folly exists in our churches when leaders are willing to tell their people what to do without being expected to show their people how to do it.

Now I’m not without guilt here. I drink these four poisons, and a thousand more, daily. The point of Proverbs is not to consign us to our folly but to expose the counterfeits so we might crave something more sumptuous.

Let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. (Heb 12:1-2)

Escape the Trap of Sexual Immorality

May 26, 2014 By Peter Krol

Sexual immorality follows this pattern: words, path, trap, death.

We hear and believe seductive words.
We follow immorality’s path of action.
We fall into the trap.
We find only death.

Last week, I showed this pattern from Proverbs 7:21-27, the final section in Solomon’s miniseries on wise sexuality. This week, I’ll cap the series with one last round of application.

Normally we don’t think anything’s wrong until we begin to experience death. “Death” in this sense refers to anything that does not advance our well-being (“life”). So we feel guilty. Or we experience the consequences of some stupid choice. Or we get caught, and we lose trust with the people we love. Or memories haunt us, or satisfaction eludes us.

Jaci Lopes dos Santos (2010), Creative Commons

If you know immorality’s pattern, you’ll know how God goes about breaking it. With the help of his Holy Spirit, you can undo the pattern and work backwards through it.

From Death to Trap

When you feel the weight of sin’s consequences, thank God for his mercy. In his love, he’s chosen to discipline you and not destroy you. He’s brought the consequences to bear so he might get your attention and turn you from your destructive choices.

But you won’t turn unless you feel desperate.

You must understand that you are well and truly trapped. You’re like a deer caught in the hunter’s snare. You cannot escape the trap on your own, and you need someone to rescue you.

From Trap to Path

If you feel trapped, you may sober up enough to see the path that led you to it. You’ll see that it wasn’t a single event, a single choice, that got you in trouble. It was a whole series of choices that led through the darkness.

Adultery is far more than a single act of intercourse. Intercourse, after all, follows foreplay. Foreplay follows the first kiss. That kiss only came after the first touch. The first touch resulted from that flirting, that testing of the waters to see if there could be “something more.” Looking for that “something more” followed the decision that you needed something “more,” which itself followed the belief that you didn’t have enough.

Whatever your struggle, trace your path. If you see how you got there, you’ll see how to get out. Small choices precede big ones, both for good or for evil.

From Path to Words

With the path illuminated before you, find the first step. What did you believe that got you into this situation? And what truth should replace that lie?

For example, if your path began with the belief that you didn’t have “enough” (romance, satisfaction, respect, love, etc.), you may find help in 2 Peter 1:3: “His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence.” Or in Ephesians 3:14-19, where Paul prays that we might “comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge.”

If your path began with the need to escape from a difficult life and feel in control again, you may want to meditate on or memorize John 6, where Jesus claims that “no one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws him. And I will raise him up on the last day” (John 6:44).

If your path began with the simple belief that it would be fun and exciting and pleasurable, you may simply need to remind yourself that those who commit sexual immorality “will not inherit the kingdom of God” (Gal 5:19-21).

Ultimately, you can remember that “there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Rom 8:1). Jesus died so you could have life. When he visited his fearful, denying, doubting, cowering disciples, his resurrected lips carried a message of peace (John 20:19, 21, 26). His resurrection brings the same message to you and me.

The trick is to get that message to sink in and direct our paths.

When Words are More than Words and Life is Really Death

May 19, 2014 By Peter Krol

Easy sex will keep you from being wise. Trusting yourself and pleasing yourself are not in line with the fear of the Lord, the love of instruction. Therefore, it is a way that leads to death. In Proverbs 5-7, Solomon has made this point repeatedly. Now, in the last section of Proverbs 7, Solomon tries one last time.

Proverbs 7:21-27 consists of two short poems, parallel in structure. Each poem has four couplets, and these two sets of four couplets follow the same topical pattern: words, path, trap, death.

A: seductive words persuade the young man (21)
B: he follows her path (22a)
C: he’s like a stag caught in a trap (22b-23a)
D: it will cost him his life (23b)

A: listen, sons, to my words (24)
B: don’t turn your heart to her path (25)
C: she has trapped many before you (26)
D: her house will take you to death (27)

Solomon writes the first poem in third person, speaking of the young man, seduced by the immoral woman. He writes the second poem in second person, directly imploring his readers to heed his counsel.

Words

Bombasticos (2007), Creative Commons

Solomon warns that words are more than words.

Immorality’s words are “seductive speech,” “smooth talk” (Prov 7:21). These words have a goal in mind, and that goal is not your best interest. We tend to hear and believe these words, but wisdom unmasks the deception:

It will feel good
It won’t hurt anybody
No-one will know about it
You’ll be glad you did it
Your pain will go away

The best weapons against immorality’s seductive speech are the father’s words (Prov 7:24). Listen to the words of Solomon, those words which were breathed out by the Spirit of Christ to profit you and equip you for every good work (2 Tim 3:16-17).

Immorality will kill you (Prov 7:23).
Turn at reproof and God will pour out his Spirit (Prov 1:23).
Hear wisdom; call out for insight. You will understand the fear of the Lord (Prov 2:1-5), which is the beginning of knowledge (Prov 1:7).
Keep the commandments, and you’ll find life and peace (Prov 3:1-2).
Wisdom is more pleasing than immorality (Prov 3:17).
The love of your covenanted spouse can be utterly intoxicating (Prov 5:19).

Path

We tend to think we’re victims to our sexual sin. There’s a sense in which this is true, for when we turn to sexual sin, we’re as dumb as oxen going to the butcher (Prov 7:22). We’re hooked, following the wrong path.

But the problem is not ultimately with the path, or with the temptation itself. The problem is not with the spring weather, when people are more likely to wear fewer clothes. The problem is with our hearts. We follow the path of immorality because we have given our hearts away (Prov 7:25). We choose immorality because we believe its lies, and we want pleasures that we don’t think wisdom can give us.

Thus, the solution to immorality will never be better Internet filtering. If we want something enough, we’ll find a way around any filter. The solution is not to stay indoors or attend a Christian university. These measures offer some help, but they won’t change our hearts. We must give our hearts to the Lord and his wisdom (Prov 4:23).

Trap

Immorality is not the way of freedom. It’s a trap. A holding cell. It’s only a matter of time before the hunter arrives and finishes the job (Prov 7:22-23).

We choose sexual immorality because we think it will make us feel good and alive. Remember that many before you have fallen into this trap. Many after you will fall into it. If they couldn’t escape, neither will you (Prov 7:26).

Death

The wages of sin are death (Prov 7:23). Running toward immorality is like jumping into an early grave (Prov 7:27).

If you know Christ, you stand forgiven, now and always. He is your hope and your life. Why would you want to prolong your slavery to foolishness? He offers joy, and you choose guilt. He offers peace, and you drive yourself into turmoil. He offers love, and you mistake it for quick lust. Put those things to death, and find something better, something far more satisfying.

Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry…drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. (Gal 5:19-24)

How to Resist Seduction’s Tactics

May 12, 2014 By Peter Krol

Seduction’s tactics are not complicated (Prov 7:10-20):

Initiative
Dress
Commonality
Touch
Foreplay
Piety
Taste
Sights
Smells
Adventure

Hamed Saber (2006), Creative Commons

Though death awaits, we still regularly go looking for trouble and find it. What applications can we make from Proverbs 7? How do we strengthen our resistance to this wily enemy?

1. Before the Seduction

The battle begins long before you face sin’s temptation. This is where you discover whether you want to resist it or not. “Whoever says ‘I know him’ but does not keep his commandments is a liar, and the truth is not in him, but whoever keeps his word, in him truly the love of God is perfected” (1 John 2:4-5, ESV).

Do you have time scheduled to soak in the commands of God? Do you have adequate time in the Scripture? Do you even want to have such time?

As you spend time in God’s word, you hear the voice of Jesus. His perspective overshadows your own. His delight drowns yours. His death gives you life and reminds you of what’s most important. Hint: It’s not your self-gratification but his kingdom. When Jesus is your intimate friend, immorality’s seduction becomes less and less seductive. Why would you gorge on black licorice when there’s ice cream in the freezer?

2. During the Seduction

As best you can, try to figure out what you’re thinking while in the midst of temptation. What do you really want? What do you think this immoral act will give you? This is difficult because immorality is not particularly logical. But your thinking provides the avenue to your heart. You and I must identify the lies before we can replace them with the truth.

Did you have a hard day with difficult deadlines and unresolved conflict? Do you think sexual sin will offer an escape?

Does your life feel out of control? Do you think sexual sin will make you feel powerful and stable once again?

Are you feeling sorry for yourself? Do you feel mistreated, alone, abandoned, or discouraged? Do you think sexual sin will make you happy again? Do you think it will feel good?

Remind yourself that the Lord is near, and he sees all. How does that influence your motivations?

3. After the Seduction

You might expect me to say “remember the gospel.” And that’s critical, but it comes with another key discipline: Reinforce the pain. Not in a guilt-ridden, beat-yourself-up sort of way, but in a sobered, moment-of-truth, life-lesson sort of way.

By “reinforce the pain,” I don’t mean that you should flagellate yourself and feel sorry for yourself all over again. That would not be in line with the fact that Jesus already died to rescue you.

No, I mean that you should receive the Lord’s discipline. He disciplines those he loves, and he chastises every son he receives (Heb 12:6). No discipline is pleasant at the time, but painful. So receive the pain. Learn from it. Brand it on your conscience and leverage it to strengthen you in your Father’s love.

As a teenager, I once drove a girl home and ended up making out with her in the car before she went inside. It didn’t surprise me when it happened. I had hoped it would happen when I offered to give her a lift; I was reasonably sure she was baiting me to it (though I blame myself, not her, for the idiocy of it).

But afterward I felt awful. I felt so bad about it—not because I felt condemned by God, but because it felt so unsatisfying—that as I drove the rest of the way home, I prayed to God and shouted things at myself: “That was not fun! That really sucked! That was the stupidest thing you could do!”

I don’t condone fits of rage, and I acknowledge that this story is somewhat childish. But I’ll confess that few things have been more helpful to me when I face sexual temptation. The memory of my private shouting match has stuck with me ever since. I’m not perfect, but often, when I face temptation, I still hear my own voice: “That was not fun! That really sucked!” And the memory of the pain reminds me both to remember what Jesus has done and to reconsider what the Lord would have me do.

And I have never regretted such remembrance and reconsideration.

Question: What practical steps have helped you to unmask immorality’s deceptive tactics?

The 11 Deceptive Tactics of Seduction

May 5, 2014 By Peter Krol

Anguskirk (2013), Creative Commons

When we commit sexual sin, we are not victims but perpetrators. Therefore the solution is to keep the Father’s words in our hearts so we might see sexual temptation with new eyes. Then the glamor doesn’t seem so glamorous anymore. We’ll see the stupid deception for what it is and make better choices.

1. Initiative

And behold, the woman meets him…
‘So now I have come out to meet you,
to seek you eagerly, and I have found you.’ (Prov 7:10, 15)

We love to feel loved. We want to feel wanted. We desire desirability. Immorality flatters us. It tells us we’re something special. It comes out to meet us, unlike all those real people with real lives, who are too busy even to take notice of us.

2. Dress

Dressed as a prostitute, wily of heart. (Prov 7:10b)

Women know it; men know it: If you dress a certain way, you’ll cause people to think of you in a certain way. But just because they think it, doesn’t make it true. And just because you’re deceived by it, doesn’t make it a good idea.

3. Commonality

She is loud and wayward;
her feet do not stay at home;
now in the street, now in the market,
and at every corner she lies in wait. (Prov 7:11-12)

I know everybody’s doing it. I know it’s “every man’s battle” and “every woman’s battle.” But though immorality is loud and proud, and you can find it on every street corner and in every person’s life, it shouldn’t be that way. As a teen, I thought I should masturbate because all my friends were doing it. With the way many Christians discuss internet pornography today, those who don’t look at it will soon start to feel guilty.

4. Touch

She seizes him… (Prov 7:13a)

The right touch at the right time is like magic. It doesn’t have to be sexual (though see the next point), it just has to communicate a sense of concern and value. That’s why Jerry Sandusky groomed his victims through pats on the back and post-practice wrestling matches. Be careful how and when you touch or are touched.

5. Foreplay

…and kisses him… (Prov 7:13b)

I remember a Christian youth event about dating where the students asked the obligatory, “How far is too far?” Please pardon my flabbergasted incredulity at the woefully misinformed youth leader’s answer: “Well, other than no sex before marriage, the Bible doesn’t really say anything about it. So my personal advice is to keep it above the waist.” I pray and pray that this filthy, destructive lie might soon return to the pit from whence it came. The Bible teaches that kissing is sexual (Prov 7:13, 22:14, Song 1:2). Of course, not the “holy kiss,” which obviously was equal to a wave or handshake (Rom 16:16). I know you know the difference between that which welcomes and that which arouses.

6. Piety

…and with bold face she says to him,
‘I had to offer sacrifices,
and today I have paid my vows.’ (Prov 7:13-14)

She’s just what all Christian parents want for their grown son: a nice girl. She goes to church. Perhaps she went to Bible college. She is pretty, easy to get along with, and nice to puppies. She offers all the right sacrifices; she makes and keeps her religious vows. You think you can trust this girl with your life. But immorality can’t be trusted, no matter how often she serves in the church nursery. Remember that sexual temptation is not something “out there.” It’s right “in here” where we might not expect it.

7. Taste

I had to offer sacrifices. (Prov 7:14)

Notice the ESV marginal reading for “sacrifices”: peace offerings. Of the various Old Testament sacrifices, peace offerings were the only ones that ordinary people—not just priests—got to eat. Solomon portrays this woman as having divinely blessed lamb chops and hamburgers hot and ready. She’s got dinner waiting. And since the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, her seduction is likely to succeed.

What is the point? Only that immorality will promise to satiate every physical desire. It will try to convince you that, since your hunger must be fed, you should go ahead and take a bite. Don’t fall for it.

8. Sights

I have spread my couch with coverings,
colored linens from Egyptian linen. (Prov 7:16)

Immorality looks so good. It’s amazing what pounds of makeup and lumens of stage lighting can do to the most normal person. The human being takes on a perfect, angelic appearance. What is seen seems so real. It seems so exotic. So exciting.

9. Smells

I have perfumed my bed with myrrh,
aloes, and cinnamon. (Prov 7:17)

Immorality smells so good. A little deodorant can go a long way. The right fragrance can even cover the smell of death. Especially cinnamon. I love cinnamon.

10. Adventure

Come, let us take our fill of love till morning;
let us delight ourselves with love. (Prov 7:18)

Immorality promises something special. In fact, it promises that you are something special, and with that promise we’re back where we started. You’re not like all the others who have shared this bed. You can expect the delight to last all night till morning. You’ll have your fill of love. You won’t want to miss out. There’s an adventure to be had…

11. Isolation

For my husband is not at home;
he has gone on a long journey;
he took a bag of money with him;
at full moon he will come home. (Prov 7:19-20)

Seduction’s final tactic is the promise of isolation. Nobody sees us. Nobody will know what happens here tonight. We’re together under cover of darkness (Prov 7:9), far from prying eyes.

With the promise of isolation comes the promise of invulnerability. Because no-one knows about it, we will get away with it. Some believe sin doesn’t have consequences (the liberal lie). Others know God will forgive them, so it doesn’t matter if they capitulate again and again (the conservative lie).

All must know this sin doesn’t take place in isolation. The jealous God sees (Prov 6:34-35). The hapless victim—the willful perpetrator—rushes to the snare at the cost of his life (Prov 7:23).

If you’re caught in the snare, I beg you on behalf of Christ, please get out. We’re nearing the end of Proverbs 7, and Proverbs 8 approaches, so good news is on the way.

O simple ones, learn prudence;
O fools, learn sense. (Prov 8:5)

Another Way to Look at Sexual Temptation

April 28, 2014 By Peter Krol

We commit sexual immorality, not because we are victims to our desires, but because we are looking for trouble. We’re then tempted to believe either that we have to try harder or that we’ll never change. But there is a better way.

Those who walk with Christ will say to wisdom, “You are my sister.” They will call insight their intimate friend (Prov 7:4).

Your desires can change. You can train your heart by grace to love the truth. When you write God’s words upon your heart, you gain a new perspective on the things that once tripped you up. Instead of passing along the street near immorality’s corner, you can look out from your window and out through your lattice (Prov 7:6).

Artondra Hall (2012), Creative Commons

The scene in Proverbs 7:6-9 fascinates me because Solomon and the youth both see the same set of events. But what they truly see couldn’t be any different.

The simple youth sees a secret, life-giving delight at the end of his path.
The wise sage sees an obvious but lethal deceit down the very same road.

God’s grace will train you to say no to ungodliness and worldly passions (Titus 2:11-13), because God, in his grace, will show you in his word what ungodliness and worldly passions have to offer: death, death, and more death.

Ask the Lord to show you your path and turn you to his. Write his commandments on your heart and live (Prov 7:2).

And when you find yourself on the wrong path under cover of darkness, whip out those words which can be a lamp to your feet and a light to your path (Ps 119:105). If they’re not already on your heart, ready to go, they won’t be much help to you when it counts.

Do you still want to look for trouble? I can assure you: You’ll find it.

Are you ready to look out upon trouble and reject it? Christ your wisdom can help.

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