Proverbs | Knowable Word

Overcome Your Enemies by Dying

April 7, 2023 By Peter Krol

What do you do when people turn against you? When those who reject the Lord Jesus Christ come after you for daring to follow him? When nitpicking and backstabbing are the standard operating procedure in the workplace? When family members use guilt and pressure to manipulate you into doing what they want?

‌What do you do when your friends turn against you and become your enemies?

‌The book of Proverbs refers to such situations as “strife,” and I’ve previously addressed the causes and complexities of such strife. It’s one thing to try to avoid strife. But what do you do when the dam breaks and the water has come rushing out (Prov 17:14)? When your enemies come after you, and there’s no possibility of staying away?

God does not ask his people to live as idiotic simpletons or punching bags. God wants his people to overcome strife and evil (Rom 12:21). But the way you overcome it matters. To win the fight in the wrong way is to lose.

Fundamental Mindset: What You Can Control

To begin with, the Lord doesn’t expect you or me to try to take his place. None of us can get what we want or predetermine any outcomes. That means we can’t control what others will do; we can control only what we do.

Let not steadfast love and faithfulness forsake you; bind them around your neck; write them on the tablet of your heart. So you will find favor and good success in the sight of God and man.
Proverbs 3:3-4

When we focus on what we can do in the midst of strife, we are best equipped to live in a way that pleases the Lord. To speak and act with steadfast love and faithfulness and so imitate the God who has shown steadfast love and faithfulness toward us.

Five Tactics: Overcome by Dying

Once we’ve got the right mindset, we’re ready to practice five tactics found along the way of wisdom.

Waived Rights

Do not say, “I will repay evil”; wait for the Lord, and he will deliver you.
Proverbs 20:22

Strife often tempts us to assert our rights—especially the rights to make a defense and to see justice served. But the middle of a heated conversation is typically not the best time for asserting such rights.

The repayment of evil could take the form of vengeance. Even socially acceptable vengeance. For example, if a bully trips a kid walking down the hallway, nobody would complain if that kid got the bully back by tripping him in another hallway. Similarly, when someone shouts and swears at you, it might feel like justice to shout and swear back. But the wise wait for the Lord to deliver them.

The repayment of evil can also take the form of simply seeking to set the record straight or present your resume of good deeds. But it’s usually better to keep quiet and let your enemy show off his folly for all to see.

A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back.
Proverbs 29:11

The Lord honors such wisdom, when a person waives their right to speak their mind or to defend their actions. But it feels like death to do this.

Genuine Questions

If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.
Proverbs 18:13

The fool always comes out swinging, spouting accusations. But the wise person knows that there is always more to a situation than meets the eye. So—even when they feel great offense by the terrible and false things said about them—they know they don’t have all the facts, and they take the time to hear out their accusers.

And no matter how ridiculous the accusations may appear, something remarkable happens when—instead of going right into their defense—a wise person instead asks questions.

I didn’t realize you felt that way. Can you please tell me more?
What did I say or do that caused you so much pain?
What did you think I meant by it?
How could I have done it differently?
How would you like to see our relationship improve?

It’s amazing how disarming such questions can be. Perhaps you really screwed up, and your enemy is just not expressing his concern in a wise manner. If you are wise, you can still learn from it. And if your opponent’s perspective is foolish and unreasonable, your honest questions may give every onlooker the opportunity to see that folly and unreasonableness for themselves.

The Lord honors such wisdom, when a person chooses not to defend themself but makes sure they first have fully understood their opponent’s perspective. But it feels like death to this, especially if you are the only person who cares about trying to understand before being understood.

Compelling Truth

When it’s eventually time for you to speak and offer some of your own answers, you’ll want to do it as compellingly as possible.

That means minding your tone:

A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Proverbs 15:1

It also means speaking only verifiable truth:

The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly.
Proverbs 15:2

If you have done the work of calming your enemy down by asking loads of questions, and by communicating how much you desire to understand their perspective, why would you then wreck the whole thing by responding with a harsh word? Why would you let your disappointment and frustration take over? A harsh word will accomplish nothing except stirring their anger back up.

And if you are wise, your tongue will commend knowledge. In other words, it will formally praise the truth. It will present what is true as something worthy of approval and acceptance.

‌Maybe that sounds self-evident, but most of us don’t do it.

‌If your response to your enemy begins with, “You always…,” then you are not commending knowledge. You are pouring out folly, because nobody “always” says or does the wrong thing.
‌If you frame your response to your enemy as, “I feel that…,” then you are probably not commending knowledge, because the main issue is not how you feel but what was actually said or done.
If you allow your severe emotions to warp the facts in any way, you are not commending knowledge, because we’re never justified to twist reality or rewrite history in order to get our own way.

The Lord honors such wisdom, when a person minds their tone and speaks only verifiable truth. This is how they make the truth compelling. But it feels like death to do this, especially if you are the only person in the room who seems to care about such gentle truth.

Authentic Confession

When our self-protective alarm systems kick in, we’re generally quick and eager to defend our every word and deed. But the way of wisdom is to be patient and not be hasty in rendering such self-acquittal.

It is a snare to say rashly, “It is holy,” and to reflect only after making vows.
Proverbs 20:25

So don’t be so quick to label your actions or motivations as holy in the heat of the moment. Don’t be quick to judge yourself as being without guilt. Don’t let fear drive you to make irrational excuses for yourself.

Who can say, “I have made my heart pure; I am clean from my sin”?
Proverbs 20:9

It is true that we must not make stuff up or apologize for things that aren’t sins (Isaiah 5:20-21). But even with that said, it is simply a fact of reality that I am still a sinner who has not yet been made perfect. I should be able to find something in the accusations against me that has a ring of truth. I can take ownership of that, call it what it is, and confess it authentically, without a hint of bitterness or resentment.

The Lord honors such wisdom, when a person doesn’t make excuses, but takes ownership to confess everything they can legitimately confess as sin or weakness. But it feels like death to do this, especially if you are the only person in the room who seems to take any responsibility for their own actions.

God Pleasing

In the midst of strife, some people are desperate to please themselves, so they fight until they win. And other people are desperate to please their enemies, so they stop fighting and roll over, just to calm things down.

‌But the Lord says there is only One whom we must please. And if we do, in fact, please him, it changes everything.

When a man’s ways please the Lord, he makes even his enemies to be at peace with him.
Proverbs 16:7

Is this for real? We’ll need one more post to examine how the Lord Jesus overcame his enemies so that our ways might please the Lord.

Why Strife is so Complex

March 31, 2023 By Peter Krol

When conflict gets messy and personal, the book of Proverbs refers to it as “strife.” And the first objective for a man or woman of wisdom is to avoid strife whenever possible. The Lord declares those who avoid strife to be honorable (Prov 20:3).

‌But sometimes, it’s just not possible, is it? There are times when we make costly mistakes that cause strife. And there are times when strife hunts us down regardless of how hard we try to avoid it. What do we do then?

Navigating strife requires a wise and mature perspective. Reject the folly of simplistic answers, because human strife is quite a complex dynamic between people. Immature solutions will only end up making it worse.

The Problem with Toothpaste

Though the wise will try to avoid strife whenever possible, they recognize that once it squirts out, you can’t try to shove the toothpaste back into the tube and pretend nothing happened.

The beginning of strife is like letting out water, so quit before the quarrel breaks out.
Proverbs 17:14

“Letting out water” is the ancient equivalent of “toothpaste out of the tube.”‌ Water has no shape in and of itself. When the dam breaks, the water gushes, and you’ll never get it back to where it was.

‌So the wise understand that sometimes, it becomes too late. When the quarrel breaks out, you can’t stuff it up and pretend that nothing happened.

‌So if you explode in anger at someone, it’s not okay to come back the next day and sweep it under the rug. Yes, it’s uncomfortable to talk about. Yes, it’s awkward and difficult. No, you don’t want to be tempted to explode yet again.

‌But once the dam breaks and the water is out, we now have something we must talk about and reconcile.

‌What led to it?
What were you fearing or believing at the time that caused you to feel so threatened?
What did you think would be accomplished by yelling in anger?
What would be a better choice to make next time?

‌Now, that sort of conversation works only between reasonable people who want to do what is right. What if you couldn’t bail in time for a quarrel to erupt with someone who is a fool?

‌The Rage of Fools

If a wise man has an argument with a fool, the fool only rages and laughs, and there is no quiet.
Proverbs 29:9

‌The thing a wise person will understand is that most fools do not want to resolve strife. They want only to be right and to be served. And the harder you press on them to back down, compromise, or find righteous resolution, the more you will only subject yourself to ongoing rage and ridicule.

‌So there is a time and a place for the wise to not pursue reconciliation with someone who does not want it.

‌When Jesus was on trial before wicked men who had already made up their minds, Jesus did not try to reconcile things with them!‌ He simply stood before them as silent as a lamb led to slaughter. He had a more important task underway than reconciliation with raging fools.

‌Now in the book of Romans, the apostle Paul commands Christians to live at peace with all men, so far as it depends on you (Rom 12:18). So do all you can to serve, to persuade, and to reconcile. But please recognize the intricate complexity of strife with fools.

The time is likely to come when the best thing you can do is close your mouth and just slowly step away.

‌The Raising of Defenses

‌Another thing that makes strife complex is how personal it can get. And because it gets so personal, strife has the effect of hardening people to one another.

A brother offended is more unyielding than a strong city, and quarreling is like the bars of a castle.
Proverbs 18:19

‌This verse talks not about a fool but about a brother. Someone close to you, from your own family! Even perhaps, from the family of God.

‌Sometimes, strife arises from a deep violation of trust and respect. Dealing with such strife is quite complex, because we cannot expect trust to be restored very quickly.

‌For example, let’s say a person discovers their spouse viewing pornography. This is nothing short of adultery, and it often causes feelings of severe pain and betrayal. The offending spouse may be willing to come clean, ask for help, seek counseling. They may even take drastic action to cut the sin out of their life. There is a transaction of forgiveness that must take place.

‌But even when forgiveness is requested and granted, there remains a fortified city that must now be won over. Trust is not quickly restored.

‌It is legitimate for a person to forgive someone for an offense, but to also to need more time to see real change before they can let down their walls to trust again.

‌Please don’t ignore such complexity. Be wise about recognizing it and allowing for it.

‌The Plurality of Perspective

‌One last thing about the complexity of strife is that there is always more than one way to perceive a situation.

The one who states his case first seems right, until the other comes and examines him.
Proverbs 18:17

‌Perhaps you have a friend who has been deeply hurt, or who has been struggling with a certain relationship. It is godly and needful to come alongside that person with a listening ear. Ask questions and listen to their pain and hurt. Ask them what went wrong and how it could be improved.

‌But the wise person will keep in mind that this person’s perspective is not the only perspective. Cross-examination is a basic principle of justice that God built into societies.

‌So while it’s one thing to care for a friend by empathizing with what they have experienced, if you are ever called upon to make a judgment about a situation—or to attempt to fix it or assist with reconciliation—‌it is not wise for you to draw conclusions after hearing only one side of the story.

‌To give a rather straightforward illustration: When a family has more than one child, there is bound to be strife among siblings in the home. And when my wife and I became parents, we committed ourselves to never bring disciplinary action against a child on account of the accusation of a single, embittered sibling.

‌In other words, my son, if you tell me that “he hit me!”—that is not sufficient to warrant a judgment of discipline.

‌More evidence is required. And the accused always gets to have just as much of a hearing as the accuser. If there were any other witnesses, that might be enough. If there is video evidence, that helps. Or if the accused confesses to the crime, then we’ve got the right suspect.

‌But a he said/she said is never enough to convict. That goes for parenting. That goes for society’s justice system. And that goes for counseling and advising your own friends.

‌Wouldn’t the world be such a better place if social media had algorithms built into it to recognize that the first one to label himself or herself “victim” seems right, until others come and examine them? I am not saying that people who claim to be victims are wrong. I am only saying that all sides of a situation must be heard and evidence must be taken into account, before any sort of objective judgment is drawn.

‌Summary

‌Strife sure is complex, isn’t it?

‌You can’t pretend it didn’t happen.

‌You can’t resolve it with a fool.

‌Trust is really hard to restore.

‌And there are always more sides to the story.

‌Part of what it means to fight like a Christian is to recognize such complexity. Yet awareness is only the first reaction, the fundamental perspective a wise person ought to develop amid situations of strife. Once the complexity has been recognized, what is the wise man or woman of God to do about it?

That will require us to search out more proverbs to guide us.

The Wisdom of Avoiding Strife

March 24, 2023 By Peter Krol

Conflict is hard.

Defining Strife

By “conflict,” I’m referring not to everyday disagreements, but to the sort of disagreements that look like knock-down, drag-em-out fights, that turn people into enemies of one another. The book of Proverbs refers to such situations as “strife.”

These are situations with neighbors or coworkers who find every opportunity to ridicule your Christian faith and try to make you angry so you slip up. Or classmates who act respectfully in public, but in private their mouths pour forth repulsive profanity and epithets in your direction. Or extended family members who point out your every flaw, claim they know you but they really don’t, and wield their expectations and gossip like hot pokers to manipulate you into doing what they want.

Responses to Strife

Sometimes Christians think God wants them to become punching bags. And at other times, perhaps in rejection of the punching-bag approach, Christians harden themselves to the point of arrogance and condescension toward their opponents.

But what does it mean to fight like a Christian in situations of strife?

Make no mistake: Enemies are real, and God wants his people not to fall before enemies but to overcome them. And the way we fight is what makes the difference.

What God Deems Honorable

Sometimes we get this crazy idea that protecting one’s honor means not turning aside from a threat or a fight. And to back down from a fight is cowardly.

But such notions are contrary to the Lord’s definition of honor. They are nothing but schoolyard foolishness.

It is an honor for a man to keep aloof from strife, but every fool will be quarreling.
Proverbs 20:3

The Lord values and honors the person mature enough to keep aloof from strife. Those who enjoy, initiate, or perpetuate quarrels are fools. They’re after their own self-respect and self-image, and are therefore to be avoided whenever possible. Even if it feels like you are giving up quite a bit, or suffering in the shadow of death, to do so.

The Time and Place to Fight

Now there is a time and place for protecting the innocent and standing up for the rights of the oppressed.

If you faint in the day of adversity, your strength is small. Rescue those who are being taken away to death; hold back those who are stumbling to the slaughter. If you say, “Behold, we did not know this,” does not he who weighs the heart perceive it? Does not he who keeps watch over your soul know it, and will he not repay man according to his work?
Proverbs 24:10-12

So the Lord certainly calls his people to fight at the right time and for the right reasons: When the innocent or naive are under threat. When the good and safety of others is at stake.

But not merely to defend one’s own honor.

So it is wise to be aware of those situations when strife is likely to break out, so that, whenever possible, you can avoid them. And when are those times? What are some potential causes of strife we ought to avoid?

Causes of Strife

History of quarreling

First, we should watch out for those with a history of quarreling.

A fool’s lips walk into a fight, and his mouth invites a beating.
Proverbs 18:6

If you have seen someone quarreling in the past, they are likely to continue it in the future. If you have a history of getting drawn into quarrels with someone, it may be best to avoid that person. Because the more opportunity you give a fool to talk, the more he will invite you to beat on him. And you’ll be sorely tempted to grant him this wish.

Pride

Second, watch out for pride.

By insolence comes nothing but strife, but with those who take advice is wisdom.
Proverbs 13:10

“Insolence” is the sort of pride that isn’t merely self-centered, but self-centered in a way that rejects instruction, refuses correction, and tries to cancel those who disagree.

‌So when someone has a track record of attacking people who try to help them, you are better off staying away. When you know such a person is likely to pick a fight, just keep your advice and correction to yourself.

‌That’s right. Sometimes you can best avoid strife by keeping your mouth shut, and by not offering instruction that might help someone, when you know they don’t want it.

‌So when your classmates or coworkers have potty mouths, it is probably wise not to correct them, lest they turn to direct their venom at you. It is not wise for Christians to see themselves as the “sin police,” or to take it upon themselves to call people out whenever they do something wrong.

‌No, please save your correction for those who will receive it. Or for those situations when the innocent are being harmed, or the naive could be led astray. You can avoid strife by not offering advice or correction where it is not wanted.

Hot Tempers

Third, watch for hot tempers.

A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.
Proverbs 15:18

Make sure you keep a check on your own temper. Self-control is a fruit of the Holy Spirit, so controlling your own spirit is critical.‌ It is also wise to recognize when others have a hot temper, so you can avoid them whenever possible.

‌The thing about anger is that it always makes us feel right. We think in the moment that getting more heated will persuade others to agree with us. But in truth the only thing a hot temper ever accomplishes is to stir up strife. So avoid it in yourself and others.

Backbiting

Finally, watch out for backbiting.

The north wind brings forth rain, and a backbiting tongue, angry looks.
Proverbs 25:23

This is related to anger and foolish speech, but a backbiting tongue is an insidious companion. This is what happens when temper and folly go passive-aggressive. So perhaps we don’t crank up the volume and start shouting. Instead, we turn down the volume and mutter things under our breath. Or we wait until the conversation is nearly complete, and then we toss out a biting closing statement like a shot of napalm.

‌Perhaps you get to the end of a tense conversation that resulted in a difficult compromise. Those engaged ask one another whether this is now settled, and you respond with, “It’s fine.” And your backbiting tone communicates that the situation is anything but fine. But if anyone follows up and asks what’s wrong, your defense is already locked and loaded: “I said, it’s fine! Gosh, what’s wrong with you people!”

‌And it’s clearly not fine. Perhaps because you weren’t honest enough up front about your full concern. Or perhaps because you have lost hold of your self-control when you needed it most. Either way, just as a north wind in the Middle East brings rain, so now your backbiting tongue brings angry looks which lead to strife.

‌What now?

So in the end, the way of wisdom is to avoid strife whenever possible. Beware of hot tempers, quarrelsome behaviors, insolent attitudes, and backbiting tongues.

‌This really feels like death, doesn’t it, to avoid strife, when the world shouts that we’re cowards unless we defend our own honor? Yet to fight like a Christian means avoiding the fight whenever possible.

We’ll need to look at more proverbs for further help.

5 Misconceptions about Wealth

March 10, 2023 By Peter Krol

The book of Proverbs covers many topics and gets intensely practical. One of the topics on which Proverbs has quite a lot to say is wealth.

The struggle for many Christians is that our thinking about wealth is often shaped by influences outside the Bible. Sometimes we’re shaped by materialism. Sometimes we react against materialism in a way that seems spiritual but demonstrates the sort of asceticism labeled by New Testament authors as “irreverent, silly myths” (1 Tim 4:7) and the “teachings of demons” (1 Tim 4:1). And at other times, we simply allow rank fear and unbelief to lead us away from our hope in God and reception of his wisdom.

Here are five misconceptions about wealth that must go if we are to believe and receive the wisdom of God.

1. It will make all my problems go away

This is frankly the lie I am most tempted to believe. Am I earning enough? Am I saving enough? How will I cover the costs of a growing family with all this inflation? How will we pay for college or medical needs? What we really need is a generous benefactor or a sudden windfall. Because if we had more wealth, all our problems would disappear, right?

Riches do not profit in the day of wrath, but righteousness delivers from death
Proverbs 11:4

According to the Bible, there is a problem we all have that is far greater than we imagine: our impending death. And God’s wrath against sin is real. My kids’ college tuition and my retirement package just can’t pay for such things. Only one thing can deliver us from death, or profit us in the day of wrath. Righteousness. And the entire Bible shows us how to get it (e.g. 2 Cor 5:21, Phil 3:8-11).

So wealth will never make your problems go away (see also Prov 11:28). But the amazing thing is that it just might help make other people’s problems go away. Wealth and people are both realities in this fallen world. But which one will serve, and which will be served? Use people to serve your wealth, and you’re in grave danger (James 5:1-6, 1 Tim 6:17). But use wealth to serve people, and the Lord himself says he is now in your debt (Prov 19:17, Matt 25:40).

2. I can tell who has it and who doesn’t

We tend to think we can tell the rich from the poor by looking. And this is great, because then we know whom to ask for favors (Prov 19:6). But appearances are deceiving.

One pretends to be rich, yet has nothing; another pretends to be poor, yet has great wealth.
Proverbs 13:7

Those who appear to be rich often appear that way for a reason: They’re good at holding onto their stuff for themselves. And it would knock your socks off to find out which of your acquaintances are the most generous with their wealth. Because they are so generous, they tend to keep very little for themselves to flaunt.

One gives freely, yet grows all the richer; another withholds what he should give, and only suffers want.
Proverbs 11:24

I have been a support-raising missionary for nearly a quarter of a century, and I don’t know why I’m still surprised, but I am. Those whom I think could give generously to support the mission often do not. Sometimes, they look like they can because they have lots of stuff. Yet often, those whom I am afraid to ask—because they don’t look like they can afford it—are those who write checks in the thousands or tens of thousands of dollars.

This is not an exact science. I am not saying that appearances are always the exact opposite of the truth. I’m simply saying that you can’t tell who has the most wealth just by looking at their lifestyle. Such judgment didn’t work on the Lord Jesus (2 Cor 8:9).

3. It is something I ought to feel guilty about

The Bible extends some serious warnings to the wealthy, since it is ridiculously easy to transfer my allegiance from God to my investment portfolio. Anyone who comes close to wealth ought to be sobered by it and wary of it. Wealth is something of a ticking time bomb or hot potato that will burn you if you hold onto it too long.

The problem, however, is that sometimes we take such truths and turn them into guilt trips. As though God wants people to be poor. As though it is unchristian to have access to wealth. As though one ought to be ashamed of themself if God has blessed them in material ways. But:

The blessing of the LORD makes rich, and he adds no sorrow to it.
Proverbs 10:22

God does not promise to make every one of his children wealthy here on earth, but he does bless some with wealth. And he blesses a few of those with a lot of wealth. He doesn’t do it to make their lives easy or problem-free (see misconception #1 above), but he does do it. Often, it’s not simply a random gift, given for no reason. It may simply be the fruit of living a life of wisdom.

In the house of the righteous there is much treasure, but trouble befalls the income of the wicked.
Proverbs 15:6.

Some people have no wealth because they’ve devoured it for selfish ends (Prov 21:20). But when a person wisely sees their wealth as not “mine” but the Lord’s, there is a strong motivation to collect more of it and put it to good use in service of others. The Bible does not lay a guilt trip on such people, and neither should we. When a believer is faithful with a little responsibility, the Lord’s reward is to give them even more such responsibility (Matt 25:21, 23).

4. It doesn’t matter how I get it

This should be obvious in light of the prior misconceptions, but it’s worth saying outright: Though wealth is not a bad thing in itself, that doesn’t mean we’re right to acquire it by any means possible.

Treasures gained by wickedness do not profit, but righteousness delivers from death.
Proverbs 10:2

There’s that inconvenient reminder of death again! If you acquire your wealth through wickedness, it won’t be of any help when it matters most.

So don’t gather wealth through wickedness. But also, don’t gather it through haste (Prov 13:11) or stinginess (Prov 28:22). That’s right: Your lottery earning will neither last nor keep its promises to you. And the image of a miserly Christian is a scandalous contradiction.

Hard, honest work over the course of a lifetime is the best way to go (Prov 13:11, 21:5).

5. It doesn’t matter whether someone has it or not

Have you ever been tempted to just throw your hands in the air and give up? Financial matters can be stressful and disheartening. Why not conclude that it just doesn’t matter? Wouldn’t it be a more faith-filled and Spirit-filled way of living to say, “I don’t care about money or wealth. I’m just not going to pursue it or think about it. God knows what I need, so I’ll just let go of the issue and let him provide whatever I need when I need it.”

That may sound mature, but it may represent a failure to grasp the first 4 misconceptions! Wealth cannot make your problems go away, but it can effectively alleviate the problems of others. You can’t tell who has it and who doesn’t, because those who are wise make use of it to serve others. You don’t have to feel guilty about wealth if you will be as generous with it as God has been with you. And it does matter how you get it: Not by using people but in order to serve them.

We’re real people with with real bodies in a real world filled with real suffering. Wealth can dramatically affect the quality of someone’s life, and that is the very reason why the Bible cares so much about the poor! Not because it’s better to be poor, but because God gives his people wealth to relieve the poor.

God wants you to use wealth to make friends with the people around you so you can win them to Christ (Prov 14:20, Luke 16:8-9).

And the wise person does not demonstrate a lack of awareness or concern with wealth but a deep awareness of such things, as demonstrated by their prayer:

Give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with the food that is needful for me, lest I be full and deny you and say, ‘Who is the LORD?’ or lest I be poor and steal and profane the name of my God.
Proverbs 30:8-9

The prayer of the wise is neither a request to take wealth away nor a request to give all wealth to remove problems. No, the wise and righteous prayer is a prayer for plenty. A prayer for whatever God deems sufficient for his purpose.

And God’s purpose is clear: that we would love him with all our hearts, and love our neighbors as ourselves. So will you use people to serve your wealth, or will you use your wealth to serve people?

The Problem with Proverbs

March 3, 2023 By Peter Krol

What a unique treasure we have in the book of Proverbs! No other book of the Bible is as intensely practical as Proverbs. No other book presents such tremendous hope in the mundane parts of life. And no other book presents its material in quite the jumbled mess Proverbs appears to be.

If you have ever tried a chapter-a-day Bible reading plan, you understand how difficult it is to read Proverbs. Nearly every verse demands a pause for reflection. And much of the book yields only tenuous logical connections between one verse and the next. The book does not tell a story like Job. It rarely presents a train of thought across an extended poem like the Psalms. It (mostly) does not make a sustained argument like Ecclesiastes.

So how should we approach this book?

The Problem of Practicality

Proverbs is famous because it gets so wildly practical. There is a reason the pocket Bibles produced by the Gideons consist not only of the New Testament but also the Psalms and Proverbs. This book is so practical that people love to pilfer its riches in all kinds of ways.

Take for example, this 2006 work [unabashed affiliate link!] endorsed by such luminaries as David Jeremiah, Gary Chapman, Ruth Graham, and Chuck Norris. What a promising title! The Richest Man Who Ever Lived: King Solomon’s Secrets to Success, Wealth, and Happiness. Who wouldn’t want access to such secrets?

In The Richest Man Who Ever Lived, Scott reveals Solomon’s key for winning every race, explains how to resolve conflicts and turn enemies into allies, and discloses the five qualities essential to becoming a valued and admired person at work and in your personal life. Scott illustrates each of Solomon’s insights and strategies with anecdotes about his personal successes and failures, as well as those of such extraordinary people as Benjamin Franklin, Thomas Edison, Oprah Winfrey, Bill Gates, and Steven Spielberg.

At once inspiring and instructive, The Richest Man Who Ever Lived weaves the timeless truths of one of our greatest works of literature into a detailed roadmap for successful living today.
From the marketing copy

This sounds amazing, and the book has more than 1,600 reviews (over 1,300 of them five-star) to back it up.

Now I confess I haven’t read the entire book. I couldn’t make it past the first few chapters, where it was clear that Mr. Scott all but ignores the worldview of Prov 1-9 in favor of the practicals of Prov 10-31. And this simply will not do when we come to the book of Proverbs.

We cannot be dazzled by the book’s practicality to the point of ignoring the context established in the opening chapters.

The Problem of Arrangement

Proverbs 10-31 present six collections of wise sayings. Most of those collected sayings are exactly one verse (two lines) long. For example, Prov 20:3 is a saying about keeping aloof from strife. Prov 20:4 is a saying about the sluggard’s time management. And Prov 20:5 is a saying about the invisible intentions and motivations in people’s hearts. We go from one. Thing. To. The. Next.

The primary exception to this scattershot approach to collecting wise sayings is the first nine chapters. Those chapters consist of many long poems making sustained arguments. That’s why those first nine chapters are the key to understanding the book. They construct a conceptual framework for wisdom, although to say it that way is far too abstract and boring. The way Solomon himself says it is that “wisdom has built her house” (Prov 9:1).

With that house built, personified Wisdom invites you to the feast of chapters 10-31. And the buffet of those collected sayings will make sense only in light of the worldview presented in chapters 1-9.

But that raises a crucial question: How do we read and understand that buffet? And more profoundly: Why did the editors collect these sayings in such an apparently random fashion?

As for the why: We may never know for sure until we can make the acquaintance of these editors in the world to come and ask them directly. The best answer I’ve heard was from my seminary professor, who postulated that the book simulates how real life works. You never have a day of your life where you think about, or have to deal with, nothing but money. And another day dealing with nothing but friendship. And another day dealing with nothing but speech. No, our lives are a jumble of topics from moment to moment. Perhaps the proverbs were collected in a jumbled way to simulate how real life is lived day after day.

As for the how: Proverbs 10-31 nearly demands that we search its treasures for topical threads. We must glut ourselves on wisdom’s feast to find all the verses about money, assembling them into a body of teaching on that topic. And we look for all the verses on friendship. And all the verses on speech.

So much, so good. We just need to make sure we don’t run with the practicals there without first interpreting them in light of the book’s worldview.

The Problem of Probability

One last potential problem is worthy of consideration. Because the particular sayings of Proverbs are so utterly specific and practical, that has led many Bible teachers to develop a conventional wisdom that “proverbs aren’t promises but only probabilities.” While this conventional wisdom has some value, it can be quite misleading.

To understand why it is misleading, we need to examine how we arrived at such a principle to begin with. The reason is typically because various proverbs seem to contradict one another (such as Prov 26:4 and Prov 26:5), or because some verses are easily abused to browbeat people (Prov 22:6). So we seek to solve such errors with a sweeping principle such as “proverbs aren’t promises but only probabilities.”

But here’s the thing: The statement that “proverbs aren’t promises but only probabilities” is itself a wise saying. A summary statement. Dare I say, a proverb? And is that statement only a probability and not a certainty? Is it certain that proverbs aren’t promises? Or is it only a probability itself?

And here’s the bigger issue: The proverbs do not present themselves as probabilities. They do not talk about what might happen or what is likely to happen. No, they make legitimate observations about the way the world works. And at times, they offer clear commands and not simply suggestions (e.g. Prov 14:7, 23:23).

We can get close to solving the problem of probability when we simply bring in the matters of practicality and arrangement. The arrangement means that no single proverb tells the whole truth on a topic; that’s why many verses all speak to various aspects of the same topics! The practicality tells us that any single proverb is speaking to a very narrow, very particular situation. And in those intensely practical, extremely particular settings that the proverb speaks into, the proverb speaks truth. Not probability, but truth.

We misuse the proverb if we try to make it speak to a related but different practical situation it was not meant to speak to. (Prov 26:4-5: Don’t answer a fool in those particular settings when it is best not to answer him!) And we deeply confuse people if we teach that the proverb is not true but only likely. (Prov 18:10: Is it only likely but not certain that Lord’s name will be a strong tower to the righteous who flee to him for final refuge?)

Conclusion

No other book of the Bible is like Proverbs. It presents some unique problems, such as the problem of practicality, the problem of arrangement, and the problem of probability. But studying this book along its natural contours yields a wealth of results, as it leads us to Jesus, in whom are all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge (Col 2:2-3).

The End of Wisdom

October 6, 2014 By Peter Krol

Teti-Tots (2010), Creative Commons

This is my last post about Proverbs 1-9, and I end where Solomon ends—with a warning. Though folly looks a lot like wisdom, don’t let it deceive you. It will flatter you, trick you, and end you.

The woman Folly is loud;
she is seductive and knows nothing.
She sits at the door of her house;
she takes a seat on the highest places of the town,
calling to those who pass by,
who are going straight on their way.
“Whoever is simple, let him turn in here!”
And to him who lacks sense she says,
“Stolen water is sweet,
and bread eaten in secret in pleasant.”
But he does not know that the dead are there,
that her guests are in the depths of Sheol. (Prov 9:13-18, ESV)

I’ve listed extensive comparisons and contrasts between the feasts of wisdom and folly. In this post, I simply want to warn you of 4 things that look like wisdom but are not. They have ensnared many in our day.

Materialism

Some find their life and security in their abundance of possessions. Others react and find their life and security in their lack of possessions. Both are fools, though they often think themselves wise. Money is neither a god to be worshiped nor a demon to be exorcised. It is a tool useful for building God’s kingdom. It makes friends; it persuades kings. But God can give it or take it away as he pleases, and the wise will bow to him alone.

Sensuality

Some think sex will make them happy. Others react and treat it as something unfit to be discussed in Bible study. Both are fools, though they often think themselves wise. Sex is neither the chief end of man nor the fruit of the fall. The wise won’t ignore the temptation common to man, to abuse this gift. And the wise won’t wield the subject like a taser, merely for its shock value. But…what can I say? The wise husband loves his wife’s breasts (Prov 5:19). And the wise wife will find things about her husband that are equally intoxicating (Song 1:2).

Autonomy

“If you are wise, you are wise for yourself” (Prov 9:12). But that doesn’t mean you can be wise by yourself. Nor that you get to decide what is wise (Gen 3:6). Wisdom begins with the fear of the Lord, and it ends when instruction goes despised and unheeded. Those who have their act together may have an appearance of wisdom, but they deny wisdom’s true power to change and guide anyone (Prov 1:5).

Authoritarianism

Some fools believe their role or authority gives them value and power over people. Those who support such folly are fools themselves. A sanitized version of this folly exists in our churches when leaders are willing to tell their people what to do without being expected to show their people how to do it.

Now I’m not without guilt here. I drink these four poisons, and a thousand more, daily. The point of Proverbs is not to consign us to our folly but to expose the counterfeits so we might crave something more sumptuous.

Let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. (Heb 12:1-2)

Wisdom is Meant to be Shared

September 29, 2014 By Peter Krol

One evening last week, I arrived home from work to a cacophony of excited little voices. My four children were competing for volume to be the one to deliver the day’s delightful news: Benaiah (age 7) had taught Charlotte (age 4) how to swing. My heart soared for three reasons:

Charlotte had learned a new skill.
She had such a great older brother who took the time to teach her.
They couldn’t wait to tell me and to have Charlotte show off her mad skillz.

Dimitris Papazimouris (2008), Creative Commons

Such is wisdom’s arc in our lives: We hear it. It changes and matures us in the fear of the Lord. It moves us to influence others toward spiritual maturity. Since wisdom beautifies its possessors (Prov 1:9), the wise must share this beauty with those they love.

And so the banquet is prepared; the feast is spread. In Proverbs 1-9, Solomon has constructed a framework for understanding wisdom so we can flourish as the people of God. Now we can’t help but seek others’ flourishing as well. And we must do so wisely.

Whoever corrects a scoffer gets himself abuse,
and he who reproves a wicked man incurs injury.
Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you;
reprove a wise man, and he will love you.
Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser;
teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning.
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom,
and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight.
For by me your days will be multiplied,
and years will be added to your life.
If you are wise, you are wise for yourself;
if you scoff, you alone will bear it. (Prov 9:7-12, ESV)

Find Your Students

In Prov 9:7-9, observe the progression of verbs from statements of fact (“Whoever corrects…he who reproves…”) to imperatives (“Do not reprove…Give instruction…”). Verse 8 clarifies the connection: Because a scoffer will hate you, do not reprove him. However, your instruction will make a wise man wiser and grow his love for what you have to offer.

Some people should be instructed; others should not. The point is simple enough, but how often we resist its application!

In my young adulthood, I went through a “sold-out-for-Jesus” phase where I felt the need to defend God’s honor against anyone who spoke his name as a piece of profanity. Even since, I’ve struggled with confronting unbelievers for their sexual sin, correcting ungodly parents who refuse to discipline, and speaking my mind way too freely. While desiring to make a difference is praiseworthy, scolding those who don’t want correction is not.

If you want to be a teacher of wisdom, your first test is to find your students. Ask questions; work hard to understand. Once you see how they respond to correction in small things, you’ll discern if they’re ready to hear it in big things.

Take them to God

When you invest God’s wisdom in the right people, amazing things happen. They love you and will express appreciation. Their lives will change, and they’ll credit you as a prime mentor.

But beware these doomed, potentially damnable words:

“I’ve never had a friend like you before…”
“I’ve had bad experiences with Christians, but you’re so much different from all the rest…”
“I don’t think I’ll find this quality of teaching anywhere else…”

These statements are not inherently wrong, but they may signal an unhealthy dependence. Honoring our teachers is good and right, as long as we never put them in the place of God. Remember the beginning of wisdom (Prov 9:10). Always remind your students of the beginning. Ferociously guard the beginning.

True insight is knowing the Holy One. Nothing more; nothing less.

Remember their Responsibility (and Yours)

When you stay firmly planted in the fear of the Lord, you’ll find a sober view of success. Your life (both temporal and eternal) comes not from how many followers you have, but from the Lord himself—mediated through his wisdom (Prov 9:11-12).

People can’t get “in” with God just because they follow your school of thought. If you could be perfectly wise and righteous, you could still deliver only yourself (Ezek 14:12-20). Not a single soul—be it your student, disciple, parishioner, devotee, son, or daughter—could ride your coattails to glory. “If you are wise, you are wise for yourself.”

Of course, only One could actually have saved himself. Praise God he chose not to. Our job—even our message—is but to believe in him and have eternal life.

How to Read Proverbs 10-31 in Light of Proverbs 1-9

September 15, 2014 By Peter Krol

In Proverbs 9, wisdom has built her house and invites you to her feast. Last week, I argued that the house is Proverbs 1-9 and the feast is Proverbs 10-31. In this post, I’ll show you how to read Proverbs in this way.

What to Remember from Proverbs 1-9

Debbi Long (2008), Creative Commons

I can’t exhaust in a short list what Solomon took 9 chapters to explain. But I find a few organizing hooks helpful:

There are three kinds of people: wise, fool, simple.
The first step toward wisdom is a willingness to change, evident by listening to what God says.
Listening to God’s wisdom involves both passive reception and active pursuit.
The two primary obstacles to wisdom are easy money and easy sex; both cause us to focus on ourselves instead of the Lord.
God’s wisdom changes everything about us, including hopes, disappointments, relationships, and influence.
The Savior, the Sluggard, and the Sower of Discord deserve careful attention and avoidance.

For further explanation of any of these points, see the Proverbs table of contents page.

The Main Idea when Moving into Proverbs 10-31

The key point is this: Godly wisdom always takes place in the context of a relationship with God. Of course we see echoes of God’s wisdom when ungodly people follow his principles. But such wisdom is at best incomplete, and at worst counterfeit.

How to Read Proverbs 10-31

It will be easier for me to show you than to tell you, so let’s look at the first few verses.

Proverbs 10:1

I covered this one last week.

Proverbs 10:2

A wrong or incomplete way to read it: Conduct your business with honesty and integrity.

A better way to read it: Though easy money (unjust gain) promises security and community (Prov 1:13-14), it can’t keep those promises. God’s favor is available to those who seek his wisdom; this favor gives life beyond the grave (Prov 8:34-35).

Proverbs 10:3

A wrong reading: If I serve God, he’ll make my life prosper.

A better reading: Those who hunger and thirst for God’s righteousness will be satisfied (Prov 2:9). But life on earth often doesn’t go as we expect (Prov 3:11-12).

Proverbs 10:4

An incomplete reading: Work hard.

A better reading: This verse is pretty close to Proverbs 6:10-11. We must remember, however, that the chief “diligence” of Proverbs is to get wisdom at all costs (Prov 4:5, 7).

Proverbs 10:5

An incomplete reading: Make your parents proud by working hard in the right seasons.

A better reading: We honor our parents when we honor the Lord (Prov 2:1-6), though sometimes parents forget this fact. The Lord’s wisdom gives us a long view that enables us to be self-motivated and seasonally productive (Prov 6:7-8)

———————–

Now I’ll choose a few more verses with a random number generator just to show this way of reading isn’t limited to chapter 10…

Proverbs 22:7

An incomplete reading: With wealth comes power. Debt is always a bad idea.

A better reading: Easy money attracts by making possible power over others. It makes sense that those who focus on themselves more than on the Lord would be drawn to both money and power. But there is one Savior for both rich and poor (Prov 6:1-5, 8:32-36).

Proverbs 24:13-14

An incomplete reading: Wisdom in general is good for us. Learning and education make our lives better.

A better reading: Wisdom comes from the Lord (Prov 2:6). Knowing him is good for us and will make our lives better.

Proverbs 20:16

An incomplete reading: We should counsel people to make good financial decisions, and we should hold them accountable for poor ones.

A better reading: If someone tries to be the kind of savior that only the Lord can be, we should be careful not to increase his credit limit. Your trust in the Lord may sometimes decrease your trust in those who promise too much.

———————–

In most cases, the “incomplete” reading is not necessarily wrong, just…incomplete. Be careful not to use Proverbs as though God himself is irrelevant. Always remember the context of chapters 1-9.

What is Wisdom’s Feast?

September 8, 2014 By Peter Krol

Discussions of Proverbs 9 often settle on a list of contrasts between the feasts of Wisdom and Folly, and I couldn’t resist beginning my study there. But observing contrasts merely gets us started. Interpretation compels us to ask a “What” question and a “Why” question:

What is Wisdom’s feast?
Why does Wisdom invite us to this feast?

The second question is pretty easy, and we’ve covered it many times: Wisdom offers life (Prov 9:6), while Folly offers death (Prov 9:18). Wisdom seeks our good; Folly seeks no good.

Ron Cogswell (2012), Creative Commons

That answer does us no good, however, unless we have a clear answer to the first question. If Wisdom provides life through her feast, how do we get that life? What is the feast, and when can we start eating? If we get this wrong, we’ll waste our time. We’ll fill up on salad and have no room left for dessert.

One Tempting Answer

We could answer the question by saying, “Wisdom is the feast.” We could support our answer by references to poetry, figurative language, and devices like personification. We’d be careful not to push the imagery too far, and we’d come away believing that wisdom is the feast. Wisdom (poetically personified) invites us to come and partake of (God’s spiritual) wisdom.

And while I’m sure there’s some truth here, I’m unsatisfied by this answer. I find it so abstract and mystical that I’m left feeling hopeless. How do I know if I’m drawing on wisdom’s well deeply enough? How do I know whether it’s changing me? How do I know whether I’m consuming the right supply of nourishment?

And how do I get it? Must I listen to the voices inside my head? Will I feel a peace about it? Will God confirm my choices by making circumstances line up just right?

Observe the Passage

A better way forward is to observe the passage at hand. We can answer our interpretive questions from the text.

Wisdom has built her house;
she has hewn her seven pillars.
She has slaughtered her beasts;
she has mixed her wine;
she has also set her table.
She has sent out her young women to call
from the highest places in the town,
“Whoever is simple, let him turn in here!”
To him who lacks sense she says,
“Come, eat of my bread
and drink of the wine I have mixed.
Leave your simple ways, and live,
and walk in the way of insight.” (Prov 9:1-6, ESV)

Notice especially how the text gives more space to the feast’s preparation than to the feast itself:

she built her house
she hewed out seven pillars
she slaughtered beasts
she mixed wine
she set her table
she sent out young women with invitations

Much work is done before a single simpleton grabs a knife and fork. And I shouldn’t say the work “is” done. Better to say it “has been” done. The verb tenses are no accident.

Observe the Context

Let’s zoom out and remember what’s going on. Proverbs 1-9 serves as a long introduction to the book of Proverbs. And chapter 9 is the last section of that long introduction. Reading Proverbs from the beginning, we haven’t yet gotten to any of the book’s meat. Everything so far has been a framing of ideas and a creating of categories. Solomon has been building a foundation upon which the details of chapters 10-31 will make sense.

For example, Proverbs 10:1 (“A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish son is a sorrow to his mother”) isn’t merely about good relationships that keep one’s parents happy. Solomon plants a single seed in the soil of wisdom’s field, and the soil’s fertility comes from what he’s already said about categories of people, appeals to listen, the blessings of godliness, and the fear of the Lord.

In fact, every verse in Proverbs 10-31 should be read in light of the context established by Proverbs 1-9. I recently saw a review for a book about Proverbs that said:

Although drawn from the Biblical book of Proverbs, it is not a preachy book. Truth is truth, no matter what the source, and you can benefit from this book whether you are “religious” or not.

But this misses the point, does it not? Any advice on money, relationships, business, or leadership drawn from Proverbs must be read in light of wisdom’s beginning: the fear of the Lord. Without a relationship with God, there is no wisdom (Prov 2:6-8)! Any non-religious attempt to apply principles from Proverbs is a counterfeit; it is stolen water and secret bread (Prov 9:17).

My point is this: Wisdom’s feast is the book of Proverbs, especially chapters 10-31. The “house” is Proverbs 1-9. Chapter 9 is the pivot. The house has been built, and you’re invited to the feast. You’re almost ready to dig in.

Though stating the matter tentatively, Bruce Waltke provides no alternatives to this interpretation:

The representation of Wisdom as having built her house and prepared her banquet may represent figuratively the prologue [chapters 1-9] and the Collections [chapters 10-31] respectively. The house (i.e., the introductory prologue) is now finished, and the banquet (i.e., the proverbs of Solomon) is about to begin. Her messengers (i.e., the parents) have been sent to invite the uncommitted and dull youth to eat and drink her sumptuous fare. Their sons are already waiting for Wisdom to open her doors. (The Book of Proverbs: Chapters 1-15, p. 431)

Choose Your Restaurant Wisely

September 1, 2014 By Peter Krol

Choosing a restaurant should be a basic human right. Imagine being forced to go to a Chinese restaurant when you were in the mood for sandwiches. Or having to sit and wait when you expected something simple and fast. And woe betide the co-conspirators responsible for my wife’s worst nightmare: eating pizza two evenings in a row.

Trey Ratcliff (2009), Creative Commons

Of course food quality isn’t the only factor to consider. We have an industry based on reviewing culinary establishments for presentation, cleanliness, speed, friendliness, and appearance, in addition to taste. My town has hundreds of restaurants within a 10-mile radius, but, on a recent double date, we chose a restaurant more than 20 minutes away because it had received a makeover from the TV show “Restaurant: Impossible.” We had to see what all the fuss was about, and we’re glad we did!

Proverbs 9

Proverbs 9 reminds us that we always have a dining choice. When hunger (for life, fulfillment, advice, or simply “something more”) drives us to seek sustenance and satisfaction, we will look for a good restaurant. Some will find a reputable proprietorship; others will be terribly deceived. Make sure you eat at the right place.

In this chapter, wisdom offers a delightful and nourishing feast (Prov 9:1-6), which is meant to be shared (Prov 9:7-12). Folly peddles something illegitimate, unsanitary, poisonous (Prov 9:13-18). Since appearances can be terribly deceiving, we must learn how to tell the difference.

Wisdom has built her house;
she has hewn her seven pillars.
She has slaughtered her beasts;
she has mixed her wine;
she has also set her table.
She has sent out her young women to call
from the highest places in the town,
“Whoever is simple, let him turn in here!”
To him who lacks sense she says,
“Come, eat of my bread
and drink of the wine I have mixed.
Leave your simple ways, and live,
and walk in the way of insight.” (Prov 9:1-6, ESV)

The woman Folly is loud;
she is seductive and knows nothing.
She sits at the door of her house;
she takes a seat on the highest places of the town,
calling to those who pass by,
who are going straight on their way.
“Whoever is simple, let him turn in here!”
And to him who lacks sense she says,
“Stolen water is sweet,
and bread eaten in secret in pleasant.”
But he does not know that the dead are there,
that her guests are in the depths of Sheol. (Prov 9:13-18, ESV)

Next week, I’ll do more interpreting and applying (“What is Wisdom’s feast?”). For now, let’s simply observe comparisons and contrasts.

Comparisons

In many ways, these two feasts share similar features:

a hostess (Prov 9:1, 13)
a home (Prov 9:1, 14)
an invitation to the simple (Prov 9:4, 16)
food and drink (Prov 9:2, 17)
hubbub at the highest places in town (Prov 9:3, 14)
a promise (Prov 9:6, 17)
a change in the status of house guests (Prov 9:6, 18)

But don’t get distracted by appearances. Beauty, as they say, is a different matter after you’ve skinned the thing.

Contrasts

When the simple get moving toward the Lord, the scales fall and truth becomes clear. These two feasts couldn’t be any more different:

wisdom builds; folly sits (Prov 9:1, 14)
wisdom is clever; folly knows nothing (Prov 9:1, 13)
wisdom wins loyal servants; folly is loud (Prov 9:3, 13)
wisdom lets her food speak for itself; folly seduces and deceives (Prov 9:5, 13, 17)
wisdom has meat with wine and bread; folly has but stolen water and secret bread (Prov 9:2, 5, 17)
wisdom prepares for important guests; folly grabs whoever happens to pass by (Prov 9:2-3, 15)
wisdom works with a team; folly takes a seat (Prov 9:3, 14)
wisdom makes her food; folly steals her food (Prov 9:5, 17)
wisdom promotes life change; folly promises secret pleasure (Prov 9:6, 17)
wisdom’s guests gain insight; folly’s visitors don’t know what is happening to them (Prov 9:6, 18)
wisdom’s visitors live; folly’s guests die (Prov 9:6, 18)

Two people see the same pornographic advertisement; one is turned off, and the other is turned on. Two investors discover the same questionable loophole; one sees loss, and the other sees gain. Two spouses experience the same set of conflicts; one sees a chance to deepen intimacy, and the other looks for a permanent way out.

These things should not surprise us. Some people make themselves sick on cotton candy; others know to hold out for the rib eye and Merlot. Which are you?

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